Funny Bumper Stickers - 2

Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.

Out of my mind...Back in five minutes.

Don't drink and drive...You might hit a bump and spill your drink.

Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.

Honk If You Want To See My Finger

I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.

Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.

Your child may be an honor student but you're still an idiot.

Save the whales! Trade them for valuable prizes.

My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her ...or something like that.

Jail Vs. Work

IN PRISON...you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell. AT WORK ... you spend the majority of your time in a 6X8 cubicle. IN PRISON...you get three meals a day. AT WORK...you only get a break for one meal and you pay for it. IN PRISON...you get time off for good behavior AT WORK...you get more work for good behavior IN PRISON...the guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you. AT WORK...you must carry around a security card and open all the doors for yourself. IN PRISON...you can watch TV and play games. AT WORK...you get fired for watching TV and playing games. IN PRISON...you get your own toilet. AT WORK...you have to share with some idiot who pees on the seat. IN PRISON...they allow your family and friends to visit. AT WORK...you can't even speak to your family. IN PRISON...the taxpayers pay all expenses with no work required. AT WORK...you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners. IN PRISON...you spend most of your life inside bars wanting to get out. AT WORK...you spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars. IN PRISON...you must deal with sadistic wardens. AT WORK...they are called managers.

You can find more jokes like this in the Jokes about Work category.