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Joke of the Day

On this page you will find todays 'Joke of the Day' plus the listings for the last seven days.

You will also be able to view the archive from the past sixteen weeks.

The Joke of the Day Archive

This is our archive where you can view previous 'Joke of the Day' listings.

Here is page one of our archive and it currently covers from Wednesday, December 6th, 2017 to Tuesday, December 12th, 2017.

There are sixteen pages in this archive and each page covers seven days.

Joke of the Day for Wednesday, December 13th, 2017

What is the name of the prize that is awarded each year to the most successful dieter?
The no - belly prize.

Joke of the Day for Tuesday, December 12th, 2017

Patient: Doctor, doctor, I've just been bitten by a dog.
Doctor: Name?
Patient: Fido.

Joke of the Day for Monday, December 11th, 2017

Two drunks were riding a roller coaster, when one turned to the other and said, "We may be making good time, but I've got a feeling we're on the wrong bus."

Joke of the Day for Sunday, December 10th, 2017

Why do bananas never get lonely?
Because they always go around in bunches.

Joke of the Day for Saturday, December 9th, 2017

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Cows Who.
Cows go moo, not who.

Joke of the Day for Friday, December 8th, 2017

A man was out for a walk one day and on his travels he wandered through a farm. Strangely, he saw a pig with a wooden leg! This intrigued him so much he found the farmer and quizzed him about it.
"This be no ordinary pig" said the farmer. "For example, only two days ago there was a fire in the chicken shed when I was away from the farm. The pig noticed this and immediately went and let all the chickens out into the yard. He then phoned for the fire brigade and came straight back to hold the fire until they arrived!"
"And a few weeks ago, I was driving my tractor down a steep hill, when I lost control and the vehicle overturned - knocking me unconscious! The pig saw this, phoned for the ambulance and then rushed to the tractor and pulled me clear of the cab just before it set on fire."
The farmer was just about to launch into another tale when the man said "Yes yes, but what about the wooden leg?"
"Well" said the farmer "when you've got an pig as good as that, you don't eat it all at once!"

Joke of the Day for Thursday, December 7th, 2017

What do wives and police cars have in common?
They both make lots of noise to let you know when you've done something wrong.

Joke of the Day for Wednesday, December 6th, 2017

My brother went to the doctor. He said, 'I feel like a bar of soap.
The doctor said, 'That's life, boy.'

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