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Joke of the Day

On this page you will find todays 'Joke of the Day' plus the listings for the last seven days.

You will also be able to view the archive from the past sixteen weeks.

The Joke of the Day Archive

This is our archive where you can view previous 'Joke of the Day' listings.

Here is page one of our archive and it currently covers from Thursday, August 9th, 2018 to Wednesday, August 15th, 2018.

There are sixteen pages in this archive and each page covers seven days.

Joke of the Day for Thursday, August 16th, 2018

Your dog just chased the postman down the road on his bike.
You must be mistaken my dog hasn't got a bike.

Joke of the Day for Wednesday, August 15th, 2018

How many Quality managers does it take to change a light bulb?
We've formed a quality circle to study the problem of why light bulbs burn out and to determine the best thing we as managers can do to enable light bulbs to work smarter, not harder.

Joke of the Day for Tuesday, August 14th, 2018

A disconsolate father sat watching as his daughter tried on one wedding dress after another, each one more expensive than the last. ''I don't mind giving her away.'' he muttered to his wife. ''But do I have to gift wrap her as well?''

Joke of the Day for Monday, August 13th, 2018

'Doctor, doctor, little Jimmy has a saucepan stuck on his head. Whatever shall I do?'
'Don't worry, you can borrow one of mine. I'm going out for dinner."

Joke of the Day for Sunday, August 12th, 2018

Doctor, doctor, I keep having hot flushes.
Doctor: You don't need a doctor, it's a plumber you need.

Joke of the Day for Saturday, August 11th, 2018

Customer: Waiter, what's your name?
Waiter: George, but everyone calls me pool cue.
Customer: Why do they call you that?
Waiter: Because I work much better with a tip.

Joke of the Day for Friday, August 10th, 2018

Did you hear about the idiot who thought that the Cote d'Azur was a blue jacket?

Joke of the Day for Thursday, August 9th, 2018

You know you're in a small town when ...
... You dial a wrong number and talk for 15 minutes anyway.
... You are run off Main Street by a combine.
... You can't walk for exercise every car that passes offers you a ride.
... You don't use your turn signal because everyone knows where you are going.
... You get married and the local newspaper devotes a quarter page to the story.
... You drive into a ditch five miles out of town and the word gets back to town before you do.
... The biggest business in town sells farm machinery.
... You write a check on the wrong bank and it covers you anyway.
... The pickups on Main Street outnumber the cars 3 to 1.
... You miss a Sunday at church and receive getwell cards.
... Someone asks you how you are, and actually wants to know.

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