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Jokes About Christmas

A selection of jokes and humorous stories about Father Christmas or Santa Claus as he is often called.

Which dog likes to give you Christmas presents?
Santa Paws.

I wish you a Merry Christmas
And a Happy New Year,
A stocking full of presents
And a fridge full of beer.

Christmas - A holiday in which neither the past nor the future is of as much interest as the past.

I don't care who you are, get these reindeer off my roof.

Who carries a sack and bites people?
Santa Jaws

Why did Father Christmas want a garden?
So he could Ho, Ho, Ho!

What do monkeys sing at Christmas?
Jungle bells, jungle bells...

Why is a lion in the desert like Father Christmas?
Because it has sandy claws.

Don't you need a license to be that ugly?

You can find more jokes like this in the Insults category.

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